Blessed beyond measure...

Our life is so blessed. 

"Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." -1 Thessalonians 5.18

Some of the ways God has been working in our lives and through the hearts of others in the past few days-

Since my last blog post, I have been taking extended release Cardizem to help control my contractions.  It has been working wonderfully at making my contractions much less intense and more manageable!  I still have regular contractions, but I am able to stand longer and do more before they become painful.  This has allowed me to return to work, and I successfully completed three 12 hour shifts in a row this weekend!  My coworkers were also very helpful in making sure that I had time to get plenty of drinks, the resulting million bathroom breaks, and a chance to get a snack or two.  They also offered kind words and jokes to make the days lighter.

Speaking of awesome coworkers, I have had four different nurses switch a total of 11 future shifts with me so that I can work day shifts instead of night shifts.  I have already been having a difficult time with sleep lately due to all that is going on, and that combined with a few other things have made night shifts physically more difficult on me than day shifts.  I am contracted to work partial day shifts and partial night shifts.  I sent out an email asking for help, and every single shift I asked for help with was taken care of!  Two nurses in particular that don't usually work nights switched quite a few shifts with me.  When I said, "But you hate night shifts, don't you?"  I was told, "Yes, but we love you!"  :) amazing.

I have also been told that a committee at work would like to prepare some freezer meals for us closer to Elise's due date.  With all that I'm sure will be going on after her birth, this will be a huge help!

Last week, we also had a fellow coworker bring us dinner, cookies, fruit, and cinnamon rolls!  We all enjoyed the homemade meal, especially since I hadn't been up to cooking much before that when my contractions were so bad. 

I also received a care package in the mail from Our Miracle Babies.  They are a local organization supporting women going through complicated pregnancies, moms on bedrest, or families with a baby in a special care unit.  It contained lots of fun and practical goodies including chocolate, playing cards, fuzzy sock slippers, a blanket, a reading light, disposable tooth brushes, travel mouth wash, tums, advil, a mirror, a pocket hair brush, a book of word games, and many other items.  Check out their organization on Facebook or at their website http://www.ourmiraclebabies.com/ . 

I have also received wonderful cards in the mail offering love, hope, and support, and many friends and coworkers offering a helping hand in the form of a listening ear, a meal, childcare, or anything else we might need.  It is truly humbling to see how much we really are supported in a community that we have been part of for less than 2 years!

Another recent blessing in our life is that Matt has quit his job and is staying at home with the kids again.  He was often working 60-70 hour weeks, and it just wasn't working for our family.  We are all so excited to have him home again.  His support is so important for not just me, but our kids.  And I know it's been hard on him as well to be away so much during this time in our lives.

As for the pregnancy and little Elise, things have been going well for the most part.  Elise has been much more active most days and has been kicking her daddy's hand when he says hello.  When she has had a quiet day, we've been able to use our doppler to hear her precious heart beat.  That has provided a lot of comfort.

I did go in to Labor and Delivery triage after work one day this weekend due to bright red bleeding.  I was told that I wasn't dilated and sent home.  They said I might just bleed, but to come back if it increased significantly.  I've continued to have some spotting, but thankfully not much.

While I was happy to hear that I was not dilated and was able to be sent home, once again I was frustrated by the doctors who treated me.  The first thing the OB resident said to me was, "I've been reading your chart, and I see that you haven't made a decision yet on whether or not to continue your pregnancy."  I have read my medical record notes, and it is quite clear and stated several times that my husband and I absolutely desire to continue the pregnancy.  After I cleared that up, she went on to ask me if I understood Trisomy 18 and the prognosis.  I hopped right in (to avoid the "your baby is going to die" speech again) and told her that we clearly understood the poor prognosis and shortened life expectancy, but that as of right now, besides the chromosomal disorder, they had only found a small to moderate VSD, choroid plexus cysts (which should resolve), and clenched fists (which don't alter life expectancy).  I told the doctor that we felt Elise was doing great for her diagnosis and would like to do everything possible to get to spend some time with her after birth.  The consulting doctor came in said that if I was in premature labor, they could give me some steroids for the baby's lungs, but that I might not want to do that since the baby has Trisomy 18.  I was frustrated.  In light of my repeated and openly stated wishes to spend time with my daughter after birth and to give her a fair shot at life, why would I deny her an important medical treatment that could improve her lung function after birth?  I feel like they are treating the chromosomal disorder and not my specific baby, with my specific and outwardly stated desires for her life.  We will continue to advocate for both her and myself throughout this journey, and maybe someday we can be a part of helping change the way the medical system views and treats children and families of children with a poor prognosis and/or a chromosomal disorder.  Until then, I encourage any other mommies out there carrying a baby with a poor prognosis to advocate for yourselves and your child.  Change happens slowly, especially in the medical field.  But right now we can push for and speak out for change in our own lives.