We are celebrating every day, and every week. I'm so excited to have made it this far.
Emotionally, it's still hard. I don't think it will ever be easy. Some days I almost forget that she probably won't have long with us. Other days, it weighs heavily on my heart all day.
Recently, I finished Elise's baby blanket! It's the first large project that I have done since learning to crochet when I was pregnant with Ainsley 2 years ago. It's been so wonderful to just sit in the evenings working on her blanket and talking to her. Since I finished the blanket, I have also made three hats. I made a tiny one that is supposed to fit a 1 lb. baby, one that is supposed to fit a 1-2 lb. baby, and one that is supposed to fit a 2-3 lb. baby. It's really important to me that she has something special to wear when she is born, no matter how big she is. I will probably make a few more hats in different sizes when I'm up to it. Sometimes it makes me sad to think I might make a hat or something else that she'll never grow big enough to wear. That's why the blanket project was so perfect...you can wrap up any size of baby in a soft blanket!
For the last few days, Elise has hardly been moving. Her heart rate has also been lower overall when we check in on her with the doppler. It's still in the normal range, just 20-40 beats per minute below her usual. I hope she's just sleeping more or that this is part of her getting bigger and older. Only time will tell. There really isn't much to do except wait.
Our next ultrasound is in 5 days! It'll be so great to see her again.
"Our soul waits for the Lord; he is our help and our shield. For our heart is glad in him, because we trust in his holy name. Let your steadfast love, O Lord, be upon us, even as we hope in you." -Psalm 33:20-22
Congratulations on making it to your 3rd trimester :) What a huge gift! And Elise's blanket is beautiful.
ReplyDeleteI can relate to much of what you write. I delivered our baby, Zeke, last October. He also had full trisomy 18. He was 37 weeks and so beautiful. We were able to spend an hour with him and that hour is treasure in my heart. I always considered it an honor to carry Zeke and am so thankful for his life.
I am praying you experience all the joy and comfort the Lord has for you during this pregnancy. Jesus is really enough.
Thank you so much for your comment and kind words. :)
DeleteThe blanket its beautiful. I'm sure Elise will love it :)
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